Anamaria Varga

​"I'm 18 years old, I live in Slovenia and I am studying theatre and drama. What I want from life is just a chance to get more sleep."

cherimaria.tumblr.com
Instagram: @jebesve 

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(TRIGGER WARNING - & WRITING PIECES CONTAIN NSFW TOPICS)

he makes love brutally
thrusts his fangs into my skin
leaves bruises everywhere 
and i let him
even if it hurts -
the pain turns into joy
when i see his dark eyes above me
his veins popping out of his flesh
how he roars 
within me
the pain turns into joy
when he grabs my hips 
pushes himself deeper
exploring the lost city of my devotion -
you are mine -
he tells me
and i believe him
even if he is not mine.

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For you and your girl

She wears you like old perfume,
Like a dog bite that does not go away,
She does not want to let go of your torn hand - 

I reek of naivety,
Like old summer bruises, 
Who is your girl? 

I still feel you - 
I whisper,
Like a bad disease,
Bad disease,
Bad disease. 

Burn the proof of our love - 
I beg,
Once again,
On my knees,
Bruised,
Like late summer nights. 

I still love you - 
She whispers,
Like a true bride,
Pure,
Clean,
White. 

Who it is, 
Who it is that found you, 
In that morphine night?

Love is supposed to hurt - 
Ain't that right,
Like a priest, 
Preaching to someone who does not listen; 

Listen. 
I think i found you,
The destiny is written. 

She begs me to disappear; 
Pull out!
Pull out!
Pull out! 
​
And be careful - 
I preach - 
Even the nicest dog knows how to bite - 

Tear her heart like you tore apart
My purity,
When I got high
And it didn't hurt 
And I blamed the night. 

She woke up,
With a false lover in her bed,
I woke up,
With a true lover in my arms.

It is supposed to bleed,
Please - 
She begs,
Prays to God. 

But why didn't you listen - 
Like a phone ringing in an empty room,
Like a dog barking to no one. 

Like a foul mouth
Stuck to a foul mouth - 
We shared the same lie.

She cannot breathe -
And i cannot touch you,
She touches your body out of spite - 
I cannot breathe. 

She watches me burn - 
Like a witch,
Like a girl witch hunting 
For love. 

A girl,
A girl,
A girl - 

Not yet a woman, 
Not yet,
Not yet 
The one. 

Not yet loved - 
Never -
Never - 
Never. 

I pray to no one,
To myself,
She proclaims me a goddess
So that she can
Decide if I exist or not. 

She prays to me,
On her hands and knees,
Go away - 
She begs.

You do not exist - 
I burn in his eyes like
The witch she burnt,
She burns; 
But not with me.

I burn; 
With her.