When is it a good time to express your negative feelings without bumming the other person out… and how can I not bum THEM OUT?
Re: Brandi R: First of all, it's lovely that you're expressing consideration for the other person involved; however, it's important to realize that it's just as important for them to show you the same consideration. It's healthy to express your negative feelings. We've all got them. And we need to start feeling comfortable in expressing that. Find those people you feel comfortable with to express yourself. If they're uncomfortable with you then I guarantee you'll find someone else who is. Don't feel bad if they didn't respond well to your negative feelings because at least you put yourself out there. You can then say you've been vulnerable which is something a lot of people are lacking. We all need to get better at honestly expressing ourselves. No guilt. It's important we let ourselves feel things and sometimes other's feelings are going to impact us, but that's good because it means they're empathetic. We all need to be providing places where we can feel open to expressing our feelings both positive and negative.
Re: Izzy H: I think the chances of the other person not even feeling the slightest bit the same are slim. Unless you are being completely normal and have not expressed any concern, it shouldn't be hard to convey how you feel to this person. The hardest part will always be "letting them down easy." In this case, if it's just a friend that you feel you've had a falling out with, or don't appreciate something they did, then it's slightly easier. It's simple. Be honest. Everybody appreciates honesty. Don't drag it out & definitely don't make it more than it has to be. Odds are, it'll relieve a lot of the pent up tension and hopefully you and this person can resolve things.